As the weeks go on (which they are going extremely fast), I begin to feel a little more burnt out each week. I am at work right now and it seems that the moment I sit down and get a chance to breathe and take a minute out from school work, I immediately fall asleep. I haven't talked to any of my friends in a good week-literally-and I feel like a jerk. There is a fine line I'm walking on...I'm less than three months from finishing nursing school-I have to get my crap done. In three months, I can devote more time to my friends and for now they will have to deal with this. However, relationships are so important and I've often had the thought of "What if one of my friends was in a horrible accident and I lost them?" (Horrible thought, I know...) But I don't know how I would handle knowing that I blew them off so that I could focus on school...it's selfish when it comes down to it. Hopefully, none of my friends are in any accidents in the next three months. Or I will feel like the biggest jerk ever.
On a lighter note...I haven't weighed-in for two weeks. I tend to weigh-in and then eat horribly thinking, I can recover... So I decided to wait to see if it helped, which I don't think it has, but oh well. The intentions were good. Too bad intentions don't lose my weight... My exercising has been going great though. I think I've gone basically every day. I went last night and was there by myself. I ran a little over a mile on a speed higher than normal. I sounded like I was going to die, but I felt great afterwards. I know, it's only a mile, but I have to start somewhere.
I started lifting weights too, which is so depressing. I was a weight-lifting freak back in high school and it's pitiful to see what I can (or can't for that matter) lift now. But I'm sore, so I guess I'm working something, right? Such a long process. Someday, I will be thin and beautiful. Even it's when I die and go to heaven...:)
